"Unspoken expectations are premeditated resentments." Neil Strauss

I was having a (rather entertaining) conversation with a studio parent recently, where she laughingly said, "The key to joyful parenting is continually lowering your expectations."

Please, friend... take this as the humorous sentiment it was intended to be. We all recognize the importance of holding our children to standards that actually matter.

BUT.

There IS something to be said for the number of unspoken expectations we find ourselves frustrated/disheartened by when it comes to parenting.

Aaaaand, the same happens to be true when we're teaching music.

Brene Brown is famous for saying, CLEAR IS KIND. The more clearly we communicate our expectations to students - and their families - the more we avoid discouragement, irritation, and all those nasty feelings that lead to us feeling discontent in our work.

(not to mention, it helps your studio families avoid those SAME feelings toward you)

I want you to think, for a moment, how you communicate your expectations to your students and their families.

...because - as much as I hate to say it - having them sign a 12-page studio policy at registration each year is actually NOT the answer to clear/kind communication.

We communicate in a LOT of ways - and phone/text/email is only a drop in the bucket.

MANY of us are guilty of avoiding face-to-face discussions of anything remotely uncomfortable. Our defense mechanism is to result to written messaging - which has its place! - but if we ONLY tackle difficult topics via email/text, we are inevitably missing opportunities to quickly (and kindly!) address unmet expectations IN THE MOMENT as they happen.

The next time you find yourself frustrated with ANYTHING, ask yourself what expectation is not being met. Naming it is important because, many times, we aren't even cognizant of the standards we've set in our minds.

From there - and this is BIG, friends - we need to decide if it's time to adjust our expectation, or if it's time to address it.

...Always, always, always remembering the goal of symbiotic relationships; cultivating a studio atmosphere where EVERYONE benefits.

(as opposed to a "My house. My rules. Get on board or get out." kind of thing...)

I'd love to know: What expectations do you think are WORTH holding on to? CLICK REPLY and let me know!

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The fact that clear expectations are a lifeline to satisfaction happens to be the 12th Principle I attribute to a contented, effective Teacher Life, as outlined in my Studio Foundations Course.

The Studio Foundations Course covers a multitude of things, but suffice to say, if you enjoy the content I create on the podcast and/or here on One Thought Thursdays, you will LOVE the Studio Foundations Course.

There are ALWAYS aspects of our Teaching Game we can "level up", and I happen to think the Studio Foundations Course is a terrific way to do so in a low-key, low-commitment way this summer.

Participants are led through a series of videos, then through guided reflections via a printable workbook.

The idea is to help you optimize YOUR unique vision for teaching, supported by research, experience, and gentle challenges from yours truly.

I am getting ready to kick off a 6-week session of the course on Monday (06.12), and would LOVE to help you firm up your vision for teaching in the upcoming school year.

Check out christinawhitlock.com/foundations for more details.

That's your One Thought for this Thursday, friends! Onward and Upward toward BETTER EXPECTATIONS!

Be sure to click REPLY and tell me which expectations YOU consider worth holding onto.

Other Ways I Can Help You:

Teacher Community Show your love for the podcast - and gain friends from all over the place - by supporting me here. Join the Patreon Community!

A Favorite Thing I'm always adding new things to my favorites list, and today I want to draw your attention to this drum, which my Patreon community got to see in action in last month's teaching demo! Check out my (growing!) list

Can't-Live-Without Repertoire: Props to my friend Janna Williamson for introducing me to this GREAT duet collection for Intermediates by Jeremy Siskand. Get Yours Here

On the Podcast This week, launching the Summer Bookshelf Tour! We begin with a book that was born a classic: Atomic Habits by James Clear. Join me for my Three Takeaways

On Facebook If you want a group who leads with empathy and kindness, join Teacher Friends of the Beyond Measure Podcast. I am relentlessly-committed to keeping it a positive space on the internet. Teacher Friends of the Beyond Measure Podcast

Studio Foundations: 6-week session Join other teachers as we level-up our teaching game together. Check out this special 6-week session of the Studio Foundations Course. Course BEGINS June 12th!

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Don't forget to HIT REPLY and tell me what expectations are YOUR lifeline to satisfaction!

Cheers to each of us, and the many ways we invest in our professional development.

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