*the following is a reflection I originally sent subscribers two years ago. The message remains timely. ๐
What I'm learning about Student Commitment from my 9/11 Reflections.
I shared a bit about this on my IG stories yesterday and was blown away by the depth of feedback I received. I thought I'd continue the reflection here...
Everyone (at least, of a certain age) knows where they were the morning of September 11, 2001.
I was a sophomore in college, and first heard the news in Music Theory class. I noted the concern on my professors' faces as they told us about a plane crash but continued on to breakfast after class with my friends, unpacking my latest dating drama.
(Fun fact: I'd had a chance encounter with my longtime high school crush the evening before and thought all my teenage dreams were about to come true. They - in fact - did not. Thank goodness.๐คฃ)
It wasn't until I headed back to my dorm, where I found my three roommates glued to the television, that the gravity of the situation hit me. I joined them, sprawled on a futon, watching our tiny television in utter disbelief. We shed tears and said next-to-nothing until, one by one, they each decided to leave campus and go home to their families.
I called my parents, who asked if I was coming home. I can still remember the condescending inflection in my voice when I said, "I can't come home; I have a lesson tomorrow!"
As my roommates packed, I headed to the music building to practice.
I passed a woman on my way into the building who was in her own state of panic. She told me I should go home. "Don't you know what's happening?! We are not safe here!" she declared (clearly spinning out over the uncertainties of what might be coming next).
Again, my arrogance kicked in and I said, "As long as the sun rises tomorrow, I have a lesson and that means I'm practicing!"
Funny, isn't it... how most of us wish our students would take their musical studies more seriously, yet here I was... probably needing to take it down a notch or two? ๐
You should know - my first two years of undergrad were spent studying with a uniquely intense professor.
To be clear, I adore him to this day and learned a great deal from our time together. Even still, we both openly admit his methods were not exactly healthy at the time (live and learn, right?).
At that point in life, my entire sense of self rested on how my lesson went for the week.
As a chronic over-achieving people-pleaser (who also started college riddled with an unfortunate combination of big dreams and less-than-stellar piano technique), gaining ANY sense of approval or satisfaction from my teacher was my highest priority.
...add to this situation a teacher whose praise was next-to-impossible to earn, and you have a very muddled 19-year-old Christina on 9/11. ๐ซฃ
Here's the point:
When I reflect on how seriously I took my piano study in those years, I'm met with conflicting emotions.
- I achieved more growth and technical competence in those two years than at any other point in my existence. It turns out, working like your life depends on it can yield impressive results.
- There is something intoxicating - not to mention self-indulgent - about taking piano study so. very. seriously.
- Of course, I was also an emotional wreck. I was trapped in an endless cycle of expectation and completely lost sight of any "good" I brought to this art.
These 9/11 reflections have brought me to this conclusion:
What if having profoundly dedicated students is not, actually, the ultimate goal in teaching?
Sure, none of us will SAY we want our students to feel the way I described my 2001 self, but many of us do, actually, long for students who prioritize practice over other things.
In fact, when we get them, we brag to others about our students who take this thing so seriously.
Obviously, there's a balance here. The best situation lies somewhere between two extremes.
...but it's also clear to me that having uber-serious students who follow our every instruction make us - the teacher - feel good. We feel respected... and valued... and effective.
When our students are involved in "too many" other activities, we feel the opposite: disrespected, undervalued, and ineffective.
I often remind teachers of this disproportion in teaching: we see our student as "Johnny, the pianist". When, in fact, Johnny is SO MUCH MORE than a pianist.
...and that makes me wonder if I (and, if WE, as a collective profession) should be less-bothered by our students' busy schedules.
When it comes down to it, piano study SHOULDN'T be the most important thing in any of our students' lives.
(ouch; it hurts!)๐
I know My People well enough to hear your next thought: "I don't expect piano to be their top priority, but making The Top 10 would be nice!".
...and that's true.
I simply hope we can recognize the value we bring students who lead very full lives.
The student athlete who can also crank out a little minuet on the piano? Amazing!
The high-schooler loaded down with dual-credit AP classes who can use her study break to improvise on I-IV-vi-V chords? Incredible.
The student who learns to play Hungry Herbie Hippo at age 5 and proceeds to play it on every piano he finds from now until he's 95? Absolutely worth it.
I hope you'll consider YOUR less-than-committed students today and recognize there is a lot of value in what you do, regardless of their practice time at home.
And - if you need MORE off-the-beaten-path perspectives on practice, check out Episode 051: My Practice Manifesto, and Episode 052: Navigating a Lesson When Your Student Hasn't Practiced.
๐ฅ Cheers to remembering OUR VALUE is never dependent on the number of practice hours a student logs at home. ๐ฅ
*I mentioned sharing a bit of this story on IG yesterday, and I just want to add: Telling Our Stories is SO POWERFUL! For years, I've been ashamed of my 9/11 reaction. How could I have just gone to breakfast and talked about boys like our entire world didn't just change? My story felt so insensitive compared to others I've heard. Yet, based on the conversations I fostered via DM's yesterday, I've come to realize my reaction was, actually, quite age-appropriate. I've been able to let go of negativity I didn't realize I was holding onto, all due to an impromptu story on the internet. Share your stuff, friends! It's so beneficial.
Did today's Confession make an impression on you? I'd love to hear it. HIT THAT REPLY BUTTON and tell me what you're thinking!
I read every response, even though I might be terrible at replying.