Today, I Confess: I Am My Student's Favorite.
If you caught last week’s letter, you know I’m in the final stretches of festival preparations for my students.
I’m not going to sugar coat these things: I appear to have hit my threshold. I am always quick to absorb whatever energy is around me, and since a lot of my students (including my own children) are feeling stressy, I appear to have lost ALL chill.
Teacher Mom is a difficult road to balance - which is why so many of you do not teach your own kids. I get it.
Suffice to say, I needed a pick-me-up yesterday AND I GOT ONE!
It’s a sweet story with some key Teacher Takeaways, so I ditched the Confession I had planned for today and decided to tell you this instead:
My newest students are a sibling pair who transferred to me from out of state a year ago. The youngest (age 7) was a bit slow to warm up to me, which is what makes this whole exchange even sweeter.
Yesterday, out of nowhere, he said, “You’re my favorite piano teacher.”
I laughed and said, “Well how many piano teachers do you have?”
He smiled and said, “Well, just you… but I know THREE piano teachers and you’re definitely my favorite.”
I laughed and thanked him for the compliment. Then he said the most insightful thing:
He said, “My other teachers didn’t let me say stuff. They were confusing, and just gave me new pieces and sent me out the door.”
I laughed at the time, but isn’t that precisely the antithesis of the lesson experience we are aiming for here in Beyond Measureland?
The more I thought about his three points, I realized they truly are some of the primary tenants of my lesson approach.
Humor me while we examine his grievances:
“They didn’t let me say stuff” This is interesting, seeing as how this is a relatively quiet kid. He doesn’t try to chat the lesson away; he’s pretty eager to get to work. But knowing he didn’t feel like he was able to communicate with his previous teachers is what counts.
This is why I’m so adamant that chit-chat isn’t a waste of time. It’s an important aspect of the Student-Teacher Connection. It’s also a reminder that – when it comes to children – there is no “small stuff”. Everything feels big.
“They were confusing” – proof positive that Confusion, Intimidation, and Embarrassment are the true enemies of music study. I will die on this hill. Human beings like making music. It's our threshold for the other stuff that varies.
“They just game me new pieces and sent me out the door” I talk about this in-depth in The Varsity Musician’s Playbook, but our students NEED to understand our studio is a community. Many students mistakenly feel like they are only part of your life for 30 minutes each week and there’s nothing more to it. Establishing your studio as a group they are part of is essential to building committed students. Cultivating a sense of belonging is the best student retention you can offer.
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I told this little guy I wished I had his remarks on video, because he just gave the ultimate testimonial for my kind of teaching. Then again, sometimes the best things in life aren’t caught on video.
I hope this student’s words give you the boost of encouragement they gave me.
What was the best thing YOU heard from a student this week? Hit REPLY and let me know. I’d love to share in your warm fuzzies as well.
🥂May we always prioritize people over tasks. The way a student feels is infinitely more important than how many pieces they got assigned. 🥂